Explicit content warning!

Didn’t think my first book review will be this book but anyways, here’s the entries in my journal as i took pauses to jot down the thoughts listening to the book.

20th August 2024

10:21 pm

Travelling back to bengaluru. Hamsafar express. Had small talk with a women next to me. She has small child with her. Went ahead to an emptier compartment. Tied the curtain to the adjacent railing, opening up the view outside the glass window of the AC coach. Took up the sheets, and press play on fifty shades of grey. New book, chosen over the rational male volume 2, even to my slight surprise. Maybe i need something lite at the moment.

Anyways, 20 mins into the book. Nothing much good impressions of the protagonist male. He gets aroused by a hottie came to interviewing him. Ok. Acceptable. His personality, of wanting control n all, thats ok too. His what can be termed philosophy of carnegie that a well controlled mind is liable to all justly available to him etc, thats good. But getting so much sexually provoked just by a pretty girl and wanting to put his dick in her mouth, make her kneel on hee knees, well yes erotic but pulls hin off of the dominant position for me. 20 mins it took to posses your mind and enslave you. Pathetic.. The line comes, i want to posses you and there i stopped for this reflection.

Why cant i relate to that. Why dont i want to posses someone.. Is it because the possession is mere illusion and the shine of it will lose soon. As if the happiness from the trophy won wont last long. And this is a living breathing human being with their own emotions and well being. Too costly to maintain. Maybe its this.

I dont doubt that i cant possess someone. Its more about its not being worth it.

Making a girlfriend is easy. Calling a hot high quality prostitute is easier. Both are doable/affordable, but what stops me is the long term worthlessness of it. After sex or two, the bondage created is not worth it.

Here i mistake at the place that i see a girlfriend just nothing more then provider of sex. Because thats all i could get last time, with some additional wanting me, even if as a trophy to boost her own need for validation and self esteem. But anyways, lets continue.

21st Aug 2024

9:19 am

So almost an hour in to the fifty shades of gray. Good, engaging. Some things i don’t agree with the protagonist, of course I’d be bdsming girls if i did. But not just that. Hes noticably offensive although only in monologue, to any other guys in his sight that he feels could have any relation to ms. Steel. It was not just beauty of her that made her attractive to him, yes the lip biting and gazing her thick ass contributes but it was more like how she showed submissive signs, still with daring attempt to ask strong questions, even though not hers but still didn’t filter them. That with her sharpness as he guesses and finally the hotness. All makes up to her becoming a target. Other good things about mr. Grey are his philosophy of wanting to own things he deserves. A subtle mix of both aggression and capability. He has ego, but keeps it to himself. That’ll reflect in his actions surely but not mentioned in the story. He doesn’t think he can buy ms. Steel out for his quirky fantasies or employees some person to do that. He takes it as his personal matter, investing his time and energy into it. Its still chasing the girl, but subtly, without her acknowledgement. And he also didn’t seem to act too aloof as well. He shows interest when needed. Telling her hes glad she came for the interview instead of ms. whatever. And asking her for coffee boldly, in front of all, that’s bold. Him getting out of his cover and showing clear interest but still subtle. He just asks for a coffee. Nothing more.

Ok what else, umm, no red flags from mr.grey yet. And the story is captivating. At every turn its interesting to see how he sets up the next meeting, how he gets to meet and know her more. And how she responds everytime. We can peek into mr. Grey’s thoughts and intentions but not into ms. Steel’s. At the moment, she seems a bit shy, and affected by him. But hasn’t expressed anything. Its like little signs of interest or it could just be general decency.

10:26 am

Ok so had to pause , so i wont miss some points Two things Mr. Grey thinks, She asks meee, the ego reflects here, ofcourse And he questions himself, would she want what i have to offer. Although egoistic he’s still considerate towards others as a deal. Hes not like the, ill make her mine no matter what, with or against he will. And as i guessed, ms. Steel’s part submissive, part challenging nature turns him on. She’s not afraid to ask him questions. She’s also not into him or so. She doesn’t have a bf, but doesn’t consider wooing him too. Shes on her own. And maybe just there with him on coffee date so as to not spoil her own friend’s plans for the magazine or so.

And he discovers she’s a romantic. Shes into love and romance. And hes into BDSM lol. Interesting to see how it goes.

10:51 pm

Few more things. So grey pulls her close to him from a cyclist. And in the moment decides shes not for him. Shes a romantic and hes not one. Good. He leaves her there but her thoughts keep coming to his mind. Acceptable. But then he sends a note to her home address with message like why didnt you warn me. You read books and youre aware of the warnings. etc. I didn’t get it. Maybe he’s saying he wanted to be warned about falling for her maybe. Anyways. Him sending letter to her address revealing her he knows her home too, seems bit creepy to me. And when hes not good for her, why is he chasing her again. Like dude, exit time.

Then when he travels to portland taking an opportunity as brother’s boredom, he choses portland coz i think thats where she lives. He describes his brother as “working and fucking”. Isn’t this what you do as well mister. Just with more cable ties.

I found out he’s n ENTJ shes n ESFP. hmm.

Anyways. Novel’s fun. Better then i expected. Its not just we fucked day n night in this n that pose and with these many bdsm variations stuff. Almost 2 hours in they haven’t even kissed and the interest is just rising.

Nice.

11:40 am

Ok still almost 2 hours. “Well its her funeral” made me giggle when grey finds catherine eyeing his “love and leave” attitude brother who’s already running away from another chick. Miss steel drunk dial grey and ask why he sent the books. Maybe shes hurt to receive his rejection and doesn’t care to show decency anymore. Him on the other side, expresses more of his ego with statements like, she’s laughing on me? Mee? And she just cut my call? Nobody ever cut my call. Anyways here he goes finding her near the double doors.

Fun.

Oh and wait, at this moment the girl became average to me again. She actually was from the beginning, if we dont consider the looks and her indifference to status of grey. But now shes in this state. Drunk and wasted. -1000 aura.

12:46 pm

So here we are, miss steel is showing some interest in him. The whole background seems unreal though. Him travelling to portland in hopes to get to see her again by any means. Then she drunk calling her. Him tracking her and reaching the place, with too much care for her. Her friend away from her, she being drunk for the first time, the photographer attempting on her, she being reluctant, then she vomiting, making way for photographer the evil guy by now to run away and making way for our hero to defend her, the same vomit also staining her cloths, leading grey to take her home and even undress her under the same pretext. Just “sleeping” with her for the night. And in the morning finding her kind of being ok undressing her. Hmm. I mean yes its possible, but the odds are less. The timing seems just right for everything. More like he’s got lucky and a lot than his precise planning.

I need to go back few mins to understand if she really nodded yes to him kissing her or what. The convo slipped really fast and in his favour once he retold her he can’t kiss him, not yet, until she gives full acceptance. Dunno, i mean how come she responded to this with “kiss me then”. Also also did she really want him to kiss her when he saved her from the cyclist. And on what basis. Her words speak against her intentions it seems.

1:22 pm

Ok so he says why he gifted her books was he wanted to apologize and warn that hes not the man she looking for and should stay away. But its very hard to stay away.

Here for the first time she says, “then dont”

They continue talking, she bites her lips, he, to my surprise whispers (out loud) that he’d want to bite on them. Ahm. At last he didn’t keep it to his own mind. And she says, “why dont you”

How come she got so turned on so fast? Writer you forgot to elaborate.. Is it cuz of him protecting her the night before?

Dunno but now he’s taking her to his cave in his ec135 helicopter which costs around 5 million usd. Has capacity for 1 pilot and 6 passengers and would take less then an hour from portland to seattle while a car would take 3-4 hours. I did my research pausing the book.

Also i don’t get why he wants to train and descipline her so much. I mean like yes he might get that feeling of achievement and superiority owning her, tying her and spanking her, knowing she’s fully submissive. But his mind thinking that all times around their interactions.. Seems bit extra. Hes more attached to her then she is to him it seems. Although i appreciate him for trying to posses her by winning her over properly, like it should be, over just luring her in with name, fame and money. He’s even concerned and disheartened by the possibilities frequently. Yet he’s accepting of the grim possibility of not having her as well. That she might not be into his taste. And he’s ready to let go of her in that scenario existant from him preparing a return helicopter for her from his home in case she wanted to leave. Like how long you’ll be able to derive pleasure outta this. Months. Years. More? Dont think so.

Lets see how it goes.

1:54 pm

Ok so wtf He loses control and kisses her in elevator. And she allows it. Actually as per author she signals it with her lip bite. But the wtf is not for that. Its for she brushing her teeth with his toothbrush.

Like how did this 180 degree turn happen miss. Weren’t you the one hopeless romantic and didn’t he warn you that’s hes not that type. And weren’t you going to his bdsm chamber to get a fucking proof of what he meant. Hmm. Writing fell off here a bit. Or she was all time horny but maintained a fake wall of maturity.

2:18 pm

The trains reaching krishnarajapura soon. Im almost halfway through the book. And at this point, mr grey’s over obsession towards anna is acting exactly opposite to the intended effect

I wanna see her naked. I wanna see her hanging to the ceiling with belts and straps. Bla bla bla. Have you ever risen above it dude. Ever cared to introspect your own desires.. No wonder you didn’t. Only if you had the introspective capability of the INTJ as well.

Dismaying your whole attention to her smile, lips, hips and flirting skills. I expected more of you, millionaire ceo.

2:33 pm

So they’ve landed in his home. And i think we’re close to the part for what people are here for. But for me, im much much more interested in seeing how things will end over the bdsm acts the book is famous for.

2:57 pm

“do you do this to people or do they do it to you” Lol

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I want you to want to please me

How do i do that, she replies. Not with “but why would i want to do that”, again.

.

She doesn’t also ask what reward she’ll get

.

Ok she finally asks, and what do i get out of this. and his answer is, me, all of me.

Well i appreciate he didn’t say, money, car, job, which would be too disappointing, but i dont hope much positive outcome from this answer as well.

3:15 pm

So the first “what” moment was when she said as she has not signed the contract yet she’d like to leverage her freedom for a little more while.

“yet” and “little more while”? What are you thinking lady. N now after some exchange she’s saying, so i don’t have to wear your cloths when not with you? And i dont want to exercise 4 days a week. Have you already agreed lady and negotiating terms now? Howww?

3:22 pm

Shes a virgin. Tadaaaaa Lol

5:18 pm

Cool. They had sex. I thought it’ll be a hookup like thing, but he want to train her n so. The funs not over for him it seems. Will there be anything else except the acts of bdsm going forward. Mmm. The first half seemed more interesting. At least I’m still curious how his relationship with this 16th women ends.

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And now shes calling him sir. Damn. Some people are out of my understanding.

And what’s up with his fear of not getting touched

We’re almost 4 hours 16 mins into the fifty shades of grey now, out of the 5 hours 59 mins 54 seconds mark.

I can listen the remaining in the gym.

7:55 pm

After the sex, even I’ve lost interest in anna, i smirk as i raise my heart rate to vo2 max levels cycling on air bike in gym. Grey’s noticing she’s not wore any underwear makes me doubt my intentions for a while though. But still, overall, i felt in over with any interest in her. He’s not over though. Hes still doubtful if she’s say yes to his bdsm proposal. More interested in her then ever before, singing songs of her glory every sentense. Obsesseddd with her. Maybe thats what women want and its working very much for the author while i feel im turning to a proper fuckboy now. What fuckboy really is, and is for me though.

According to urban dictionary,

A guy who lies to girls so he can pull as much ass as possible

Woah, im not that. Yes i plan to chase girls and sex but with lies, nah. Must be consensual, like the book. So gotta find a different word now. Good i cleared this misconception earlier.

8:16 pm

So while the boring part continues as they engage into sex third time after day one and the bathroom sex, I’d like to take up this moment to appreciate the writer. EL James. I thought he’s a male. Found out she’s female. With modern feminist like look and her most recent novel a subject of lot of negative criticism. I wonder how she wrote this piece then. Anyways, i see this recurring theme of him portrayed as a womaniser but also as someone who finds something always unique about anna. Underlying principles are demonstrating social proof, by mentioning grey’s wealth, 40000 headcount company, the helicopter skills and being its owner, etc making the readers, overwhelming women, wet in their panties. But subtly grey expresses how anna is different. And how its his first time as well not just hers, in everything they’re doing. How with a small variation or even straight up lies, the readers positioning them in place of anna will get the arousal fucking the alpha but also the assurance they’re “different” than his past encounters and thus feel themselves special to him, in their illusion maybe. Why because I’m not naive enough to not ask the most important question. how it all ended with all of the precious 15 women, and are you still in contact with them. And surely you haven’t told them all that they’re no different then the previous ones. How did, you bed them exactly, if not with the illusion of “you’re the different one”.

9:06 pm

Some more aspects of mr. Grey. His jealous. Lol. Seeing anna talking to the photographer. Expected but him thinking if shes with him just for the money. Lolz. What are you offering dude. “me, all of me” Heh. I wonder anna is there just for “him”. It’s hard to gauge her intentions when little to none of her internal monologue is shown. And when our alpha male multi millionaire protagonist is begging to a just pretty college girl for her approval. Clap clap.

But him considerate enough about her asking again about talking to her friend about the sex thing, is a nuanced clue into he’s still not a ruthless animalistic predator. Hes willing to bend his rules for her, here considering her emotions and acknowledging her attempts to ask twice and before once when he broke the rules and kissed her in the elevator.

Show of worth, audi r8, fine wine etc again work to lure the readers towards mr. Grey i see.

But i cant fail to see lot of repetition now - thoughts of sex sex sex eat eat eat and you’re the first you’re the first sayings. It has started becoming boring already. Is it just me?

For some reason, I remember some movie scene where that 2010s bollywood actress in a movie gets 50 shades of grey book gifted to her by a teenager like guy. She seems to react like offended but later days shell surely read it. Just that scene has stuck around. Revolving around female psycology.

Another thing to appreciate about him is hes truthful, always. Telling about number 15, and other instances like responding with plain straight “yes” to anna’s question, is this how our relationship’s gonna look like, you ordering me around. He’s so irritated when she doesn’t eat though. Red flag 1. His control feels too much, too restrictive and its just the beginning. Hes wanting her to submit to him fully and not just into his play room. Yes i get the womenly desire to submit to the man but being his slave and never questioning him once you accept his dominance. Hmm. Thats slavery, not love through submission.

9:30 pm

Ok so he’s monogamous and there were incompatibility issues with all of the 15 before. Fifteen! Chosen out of thousands of girls he had seen and analyzed but none suffice. And anna’s different? Hmmm 40 mins of the story left. Good im not just jumping from one bdsm act to another and that there’s still story left.

9:44 pm

But there’s this another difference in mr. Grey and me. At least hes much more into her. Saying stuff like I’ll need to work on her this n that issue once she agrees to the contract. I’ve gone beyond that i see. I don’t want commitment of any kind at this moment. It all has become burden to me to imagine.

But then he rejects crossing the line and become boyfriend material when he leaves her at her house.

9:59 pm

So grey’s keen on bringing the first world solar tech to the third world. Well throughout the story i couldn’t find anything major to hate him on. His intentions are always clear. Hes truthful, interested in his work and quite successful as well. His personality shines more then his achievements. Yes he has some strict rules for his companion, wanting to dominate her and all, to cope up to his childhood struggles but i wont deny i admire some of his character traits. Aint my ideal, but has my respect.

10:45 pm

Haha shes got him good. With the mail, “ok ive read enough, nice knowing you” Lol. Shes got him by the balls. Shes either too skilled or ., there’s no or. She cant be so disinterested, so aloof and reject him so easily. If she did really then she has a clear sight of her life, which wasn’t indicated before. What else she’s preferring over this. And if this is true, why did she submit to him so easily the day back. Something’s odd here.

Good for mr. grey, he doesn’t accept a “no” over the mail.

10:57 pm

Ok so wtf again. She says no to him over mail and now they’re again into the bdsm stuff within 2 mins of talk. Like really.

.

Now did they come to this after her, “i needed time” response.

11:20 pm

So she meant it as a joke. Wahhhh. What should i say.

11:16 pm

Oh come on. I thought the audiobook was over but im just one third into the book. And it took me a whole day and more. Almost 18 hours content and i didn’t notice there were 3 pages for this titles’s audios on sharedaudiobooks.net

Anyways, it’ll take lot more time then. And definitely not gonna be completed today night as i had expected. But its good that their story wont just end in one final fuck in her bedroom. I was thinking if i judged the book too hard for the bdsm content, but no. Were not even halfway there yet Hmmmm. Don’t know if i really want to keep listening to it till the end. I was hoping I’ll create a blog post named, book review: fifty shades of grey and post all these entries there, some header and footer and go to sleep. Change of plans it seems.

22nd Aug 2024

10:35 am

Grey feels a bit used by anna in her bedroom. Heh what an irony. Anna for sure is leveraging her position though. Kicking him out of her house, making him do small things like bringing her towel etc shes exerting her will well, and hes doing all that, hoping she’ll agree the contract. And once she does, that he’ll properly “discipline” her. I don’t know how the fun is still yet to begin for him and the prior sex twice wasn’t enough already. Like what exactly hes looking out to do with her more. Deriving pleasure by inflicting pain? And i don’t get why anna is kind of still considering the contract when shes a romantic and his lines are “i dont make love, i fuck, hard” What shes seeing in him. Not his money for sure. Not his looks. The question baffles me as to what makes her still being undecided on this matter. The pros as per grey is him and all of him, meh. Cons? Opportunity cost of finding her “the one” instead of being his slave and getting controlled by him physically, mentally and don’t know what horrors I’m about to see. Is it about his maturity? If so, there are many mature men out there who are willing to love you, actually, not just fuck hard, wtf.

Or is it that “i can fix him” attitude in her. Her taking pride in she being special coz he’s done many “firsts” for her. Broke many rules. But he could lie as well. How come the sixteenth one is so special and not the fifteen before.

Anyways, he reads the contract and overall its just protection clauses except the part as I’ve read yet, about him being able to use her sexually or otherwise for the Friday evening to monday afternoon period as he pleases. And as per the contract again, the submissive can only request to end the torcher while the dominant can quit any time without notice. This is like willing acceptance to being raped as i see now. Here the contract crosses the bounds of morality. Luring an innocent naive victim and inflict upon her the desires of your dark triad personality. Ahh but shes gonna agree anyway, the audiobook wouldn’t last 17 hours otherwise. What can I do then just spectate.

.

Continue reading, grey.

10:57 am

Aha so the dominant is also not obliged to provide reasons for the “descipline”. I see where its going.

I should try to stay neutral though.

.

Oh and the dominant can chain or cuff her for the entirety of the period as well, yes yes with proper care for health n all. Must feed the bird aye.

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Submissive accepts the dominance of the master with the understanding thats shes now the property of the master.

Of course, bdsm

11:15 am

Must sleep 8 hours, must eat this n that, must wear this n that, must exercise 4 days a week. Bla bla bla

Sounds similar to rules imposed on a circus animal

At least there are red and yellow words

But what if she breaches the contract. Breach of such level that even the disciplinary action is revolted against. Hmmmm. Haven’t mentioned that mr. Grey

5:20 pm

Anna really sometimes is carelessly sarcastic. Telling grey the reason for burning the midnight oil is coz she was bedded by a passing control freak when she was onto the list before. Haha.

Haven’t seen her but her this careless attitude is likable.

And she’s almost into it, just skipping few things like genital clamps and questioning some other clauses or reducing them. Still not sure why, whats in it for her. Novelty?

And he really is irritatingly control freak.

5:41 pm

And now he’s feeling good over she sending a kiss to him over mail. I really expected more of grey. And he’s cant stop obsessing over her each passing day.

She didn’t look pretty but ordinary on the first day. Now shes looking, extraordinary, nothing but ordinary. Wow. Can’t you see its just your own projection, grey.

And what’s with this descipline and submission thing really. Choosing someone to be kept on highgrounds, raise them higher, then beg them to submit to you hoping badly that they wont run away. And once they do, perform all acts of revenge and descipline on them, feeling sense of superiority and control, as long as it lasts. And repeat the process again and again, searching for the long lost peace.

Pitiful.

The only good thing is, he’s professional enough on his exceptional emphasis on mutual consent and his decision to not hire any sexworker on the street. Coz for dominance to be asserted, submission is a reaction required. Weaks cant submit, only the strong can. There’s no fun oppressing the oppressed but the revolters. And that’s why the sassy anna.

6:13 pm

Pain and pleasure are sides of the same coin, anna. Grey says. Again it comes down to trust. He continues.

True. I’m getting the philosophy of bdsm now. It seems it has evolved out of a feminine desire of submission. And rightly so. Instead of hating on the submission part, it accepts this and helps grow to its limits.

The realization of “im doing this for him, despite all the pain” feeling, acts as the catalyst to this submissive nature. Although the pain is artificial and unnecessary, it’s formed up as the partner’s needs. And the submissive will do anything for that.

I wondered what’s in it for anna to say yes to this. I see whats in it for her. But i don’t think she’ll have this level of awareness. This can only be experienced first and felt later., only if done in according with the first principles of this.. philosophy?

Anyways.

And by the way, i see, how things play according to grey, despite him not being perfect. It reflects upon me that im a perfectionist myself and maybe too much sometimes. Anna’s not perfect, although she looks so. Why would she consent otherwise. Grey is imperfect himself, yes some successful in the busines world, but has so much to work on himself. Still he gets what i can just dream of. No not bdsm. Perfectionism, it’s stopping me. Becoming an hurdle.

6:37 pm

The seeing her car scene after the dinner, with grey’s commentry, was giggleworthy. After amending the terms anna’s still not sure if she wants this. Why make amends then, miss. She repeatedly shows these traits about “not behind his money” and “ive still not submitted yet”, which is exactly what appeals to Grey’s taste buds.

However i criticize them, im into the show, good work author.

23rd Aug 2024

3:07 pm

So finally anna says yes, “okay”. Grey’s on top of the world. Whoo. Took justt 8 hours. I fear what lies ahead now.

Anna said she wanted more, the romantic relationship, he declines but says her to try this, please and she agrees. If we look closely, it’s not just the Grey’s speciality. Anna’s equally special for this relationship to form. Shes not just any other beautiful girl. He had to win over her, not buy her and man he finally made her agree. Anna’s special coz she doesn’t give a fuck about his money or his control freak nature for so long. And more then why, im now more interested in how. How’s shes so independent, fearless, and not attracted to his money and fame while other girls might just dream of being with him. Thats her speciality. She holds her morals, ethics and standards higher then him. She doesn’t want free stuff, not wants monetary benefits. 500 dolors in her account are enough for her. But she still swings between rejecting his wills and accepting his requests. Because of curiosity? Can’t be just that. Love? He said our loud that he fucks, hard (lol), and doesn’t make love. And neither it looks she has desires to be someones submissive losing her individuality. She doesn’t even have past relationship experience. So why. Again, is she still expecting true love from him? And why him. Throughout the story no red flags from her side. Everytime, she just puts the ball back in his court, and with modest stance. I don’t get why she (if she) has fallen for him enough to let him deflower her, and make her agree to the bdsm acts. Is she trusting him so much? Has she considered the abuse and regret she might feel in future. Show me a peek into her mind pleaseee!!! I’m not condemning her choice but im not able to figure out the reasons behind it. Someone just being passionately persistent, is thats all the women want? And do they really think this enthusiasm, priority and attention they’re getting right now, will last forever?

Puzzling.

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He hugs her in front of everyone tho, not caring of the crowd, even in front of her father. I could never. I’ve become commitment phobic. But even him, he’s not gonna have a relationship with her, the lovey dovey one, although she might think so. Then how he’s gonna stand in front of all these people then, and her father. Is he really that short sighted or he just doesn’t care about them at all. He’s keeping his alternate life private and all, but what about the 15 girls before whom he showed similar public display of acceptance and affection. Hmmm.

4:41 pm

Must be a wet dream for some ladies to see “the man” fulfilling all their needs even without their asking for it. Audi A3, the laptop, now a mobile phone. But dude you can’t just ask to “source a blackberry phone with Anna’s mail preinstalled” lol. Don’t say you’ll hack her mail account as well for this.

5:31 pm

From some blog post i came across over my query

How likely is it that a women pleasure herself reading fifty shades of grey

Truthfully, a truly Feminine woman wants a Masculine male to protect her emotionally, physically, and sexually. Ironically, a strong and determined masculine male is a dying breed. Women are having to live with what they themselves have created. You cannot take a stand against men and expect them to want to protect you. 

https://theflexiblechef.com/fifty-shades-of-grey-the-truth-about-what-women-really-want/

Women pretend they want to be in control, but what they really want is to let go more

Aha. The principle of bdsm

From the same blog,

Women: Chill out. Let go of needing to be right and in charge all of the time. And, don’t fall for a Mr. Grey. The mystery and adventure fades as soon as your man treats you with anything other than 100% respect. 

Oh so is anna chasing mystery and adventure then? Damn i didn’t consider this point before.

So the article took me to another article, which contains this

Tonight, I walked out of the cinema feeling terrified and a little sad for your generation. If this is the movie that you base your ideals of love and romance on, then I need to make some things very clear and I hope you’re listening.

If someone wants to be with you, turning up at your part-time job unannounced when you haven’t ever even discussed that you have one and acting possessive when a co-worker talks to you is not romantic. It’s creepy.

Well i don’t know, i won’t call it creepy. They knew each other. She interviewed him and he didn’t act creepy. Yes being possesive, i get it, but in his defense, he kept it to his mind.

If you say you’re a virgin and he responds by violently deflowering you, that’s not love. That’s assault.

I don’t remember him “violently deflowering” her. It was consensual as far as a remember. And he was more of taken aback knowing she’s a virgin.

If he tracks your whereabouts when you’re out clubbing and takes you to his hotel when you’re too drunk to make a rational decision, then undresses you and puts you in his bed for the night, that’s not protective. It’s stalking. In fact, stalking is the least of what it is.

Again, yes grey might have handed her back to her friend, there was no need to take her to his hotel and so. But its not stalking, yes he made some bold moves, but she seemed somehow ok with that. Did they had a kiss before in lift? Otherwise it’d be weird and creepy as well, knowing a person you barely know undress you in his hotel room.

If he turns up inside your apartment uninvited, it’s not romantic. It’s breaking and entering.

Dunno. Still dont remember anything on that lane. She was surprised to see him but had a convo with him, not kick him out coz i don’t want to see you stuff.

If you tell him you’re not interested and you ask him to leave and he responds by tying you to your bed and having violent sex with you after you repeatedly say “no,” all the while threatening to do worse if you make a noise, it’s not passion. It’s rape.

Comeon, every statement reflects your bias in it. i dont remember it portrayed like that. I don’t remember who initiated the sex and how but it wasn’t one sided for sure.

If he sells your car and buys you a new one without your permission “to surprise you,” it’s not romantic. It’s theft and manipulation.

I remember him gifting audy to her, or just buying yet, but he sold her car without informing her. Hmm. That’s the beginning of the obsessive control i guess. Maybe coming soon listening.

If he monitors your phone calls and threatens you with physical harm because another man calls you, he’s not in love with you. He’s abusing and controlling you.

Haha nice. This must be the photographer, and since she’s agreed to the contract now, what can i say. Its part of their game?!

If beating you with a leather strap until you cry is what gives him pleasure and he asks you to do it despite your distress because it turns him on and then plays the victim to explain it all away, there is no soundtrack in the world that should quiet the voice in your head that yells out that love and romance were never in the picture and they never will be.

Lol told ya he’s a pussy inside. Being abused in his childhood, still a slave of it. The sadistic mode of pleasure is definitively debatable. Although not condemnable if it’s both parties have willing involvement in it. Please and pain are the sides of the same coin. Humans have the capability to derive pleasure out of pain if they make their mind to. I guess after making her cry, he’ll show his vulnerable side and sob like a baby. Maybe she’ll finally “fix him” and the story ends or something like that. I don’t think it’ll be otherwise. Him moving on to the 17th one. Haha the novel wouldn’t be so popular then.

My children, this film was deeply disturbing to me, and I have life experience on my side. I shudder to think that you are going to grow up with stories like this to model relationships on and that you or the people you date will mistake this for ‘normal.’

I’d say its fun to listen to, I’m far away from fantasizing such stuff but it indeed gives a good insight on what women desire and why. Can’t say the same about the majority of the audience though. They might indeed develop false expectations of relationships coz the book targets their vulnerable spots. God help them, but for me, reason i gained interest in this book in the first place is to understand what is it these romantic / erotic novels that makes them so appealing to women.

6:09 pm

Haha Grey’s been fucked by an adult women with a strap. He reveals persuading anna for anal. “and i enjoyed it” he adds.

😆

24th Aug 2024

10:45 pm

Ok so they haven’t signed any contract yet and he wants to spank her already as a punishment to roll her eyes.

Enough already, I’ve spent too much time with this book. And still its half left. I wanted to start with the rational male volume 2. And with hardly 1-2 hours each day i get to listen to the book, it’ll consume my week or two.

And im not really interested in all the bdsm acts coming next and what not. I don’t want to spend next 9-10 hours listening to porn and wonder all the time why she agreed for all this. Her monologue was never written. He intentions never revealed. It stops making sense without this crucial information and drifts into fiction.

So what’s the expert’s opinion. Well, the book’s well written, held my attention till this point, 9 hours 4 mins. Will resume later maybe, have more important books to read first.

For the story, i dont condemn anyones decisions yet or term the whole thing good or bad. Maybe I’d be able to criticize better after completing the book someday

Interesting read tho, ahm, listen.