I turned 25 last month. One-third of life is over, two thirds still lie ahead, hopefully.

A reel made me think recently,

“If you were offered $2 million to watch your entire life unfold on a screen with your family, would you take it?”

Would I? Well, I would, but almost everyone in the comments said a big no. This makes me wonder whether they are unhappy with their life choices. Maybe. But looking back on my own, it’s been good. No regrets.

Today, I have a roof over my head, access to clean drinking water, a stress-free life, plenty of free time, a healthy mindset, a healthy body, enough wealth, great freedom, and a philosophy to live by.

What do I lack? Gratitude, for wanting even more.

But really, a good addition would be some deep, loving relationships, people to look up to, concrete short-term goals, and a billion-dollar start-up idea.

Yes, that should do. And above all, the ability to fully live in the present.

Most of the time, I’m happy, energetic, and cheerful, yet occasionally caught in past memories, future expectations, or the empty void of the present. But hey, it isn’t so bad. Late night thoughts don’t bother me. No guilt, no regrets, no external fears, resentment, jealousy, or insecurity. Sure, sometimes there’s grief and unexplainable sadness, but there’s also so much love to give!

This significant milestone is a great opportunity to reflect on life.

Health

From health perspective, nothing major yet, all systems operational, No life threatening disease or serious accidents. The eye department had gone weak in recent years but specs cover that, and I’d rather prefer them over surgery as they add to my looks.

For most of my life, I struggled with being underweight, but changed that in past 2 years reaching 70kg from 53. It wasn’t very hard once I understood the concept of calorie surplus and focused on proper diet, since then I’ve been drinking at least 1.5 liters of milk a day, everyday. One less insecurity.

And what’s even better is with just six months of consistent gym, I got an athletic build with a body fat percentage of around 13% and a muscle mass ratio of 49%. The gym is definitely here to stay. Also helps regulate mood. Not really chasing six-pack abs, but on the way to build a strong, athletic upper body with well defined arms, chest, shoulders, and a V-taper.

With the gym and healthy eating, I don’t see any health issues ahead. Plus there’s insurance to cover anything unexpected.

Wealth and Career

Very stable

Been working for over five years now, self sufficient for the whole time. Started with less, but the constant upskilling resulted in 10x increase in the compensation in last few years, and very likely to make a big jump again by the end of the year

The job remains the primary source of incomes, which provides more than enough to live comfortably and save. About one-fifth of income goes toward essentials like rent and food, while the rest goes into savings and investments. With zero financial obligation and minimalist lifestyle, the real concern is how little I’m spending while the savings keep piling up. Suffering from success, heh.

On the investment front, there’s a strong capacity to absorb risk for the coming years. The current investment strategy focuses on a balanced 50-50 allocation between SGB gold and high-growth stocks through smallcase. There are no specific investment goals, nor is there a desire for typical status symbols like a house or a big car. Haven’t thought about financial independence by a certain age yet and moreover the question of what to do after an early retirement is more daunting. I prefer travelling the world through books, and the job provides plenty of spare time for side projects.

What’s noteworthy is that there’s no fear motivating me to save for the future. I once read about being capable enough that if dropped anywhere in the world penniless, one would still manage to create wealth within a reasonable time. Such a mindset and these skills are to be acquired, and I think I’m moving in the right direction.

Career wise, I’m looking to move into more senior roles like senior or lead software engineer. Right now, though, it feels like I’m juggling a lot of responsibility without the authority to match. Maybe a switch would help.

A few years back, I was all set to quit my job and dive into starting my own business. That drive is still there and I’m still eager to make a bigger impact by leveraging my leadership, analytical and many underutilized skills, but now I’m more thoughtful about taking any major decisions and not as impulsive. Not chasing entrepreneurship as to escape a 9-5 job or because it’s a dream of mine. If the situation calls for it, I’ll go for it. Otherwise, the corporate route has plenty of growth potential for me. I’d rather take a managerial path rather being an individual contributor.

I’m not sure where the future will take me, whether it’s within India or abroad. While I’m drawn to the idea of contributing to India’s growth, the current landscape makes it hard to predict my next five to ten years. I imagine I’ll likely be based in Bangalore or another major Indian city.

I see myself making a difference as an entrepreneur or a writer. I’m more drawn to writing because words have the power to shape culture and spark new ideas. While companies may last decades, great writing can influence generations. It all starts with an idea, expressed in words, and then put into action by people. The world has plenty of entrepreneurs, but it needs more first principle thinkers.

Happiness and Freedom

Hard to measure, but plenty

Recently, I’ve learned to derive happiness out of thin air. It’s become clear to me that a free, distraction free mind leads to calmness and euphoria, and it all really comes down to having the right mindset, regardless of external circumstances. This is such an exciting approach to life, as this kind of happiness depends on no person or object, aligning perfectly with my love for freedom. I’ve always understood the idea of “living in the present,” but it truly clicked for me recently when I was able to connect the surrounding dots and see the whole picture. It’s still a work in progress, but I’m very much looking forward to it.

When it comes to freedom, I’m in a fantastic spot. No responsibilities or obligations to anyone, and no one to answer to. I’m not bound by societal norms or expectations; it’s really just my desires that drive me, and I’m excited to make the most of that. With minimal hurdles in my way, I can move quickly toward my goals and reach them faster than ever before.

I believe that only different people can make a difference and if that demands sacrifices to be made, I’m prepared to make them. The courage to distance myself from mainstream thinking and resisting the urge to revert is what distinguishes me. Building on this foundation will allow me to explore paths never taken and reach heights never imagined, for my purpose and ambition hold the utmost importance to me.

Relationships

The hard stuff really, and my weak spot

Got unlucky in this department, but there’s been some progress lately.

I’ve been a solid introvert for the most part, and I still am, but not in the traditional sense anymore. Introverts tend to glorify a fear of social interactions, and while I still prefer solitude, I’ve become more open and welcoming to social encounters, approaching them with a wide smile and navigating them with confidence. The legacy weakness has caused me more damage than anything else in my life, and only if I had learned sooner to trust people more and see the good in them, life would have been much easier.

Family and friendships are okay, but there’s no one in my inner circle with whom I can truly connect. I often think and speak in abstract terms, and very rarely can someone match that level. You can’t do much about blood relatives, but choosing friends is entirely up to me. I believe the essence of making great friends is simply not falling for mediocre ones for long enough, out of desperation or loneliness, and the same applies to love as well.

Speaking of love and romantic relationships, although it came a bit later in life, it was, sweet.

Moving on was tough, and that consumed the majority of my time lately. However, I don’t hold resentment towards my ex anymore. She didn’t really cheat and genuinely attempted to convey her lost feelings for me. It was my failure to recognize those signals, dismissing them as trivial. What she chose to do afterward is entirely her business, and I have no right to judge her for that. The only regret that remains is not having loved her enough.

But lessons learnt, nothing harder then dealing with the grief of losing someone dear to you. No amount of material loss equates to this. Human interactions are a very risky affair.

Going forward, I’m glad to have a clearer understanding of what love is not, and I believe the rest will follow.

Years ago, I thought very little of myself and doubted if anyone would want to marry me, especially after dropping out and facing an uncertain future. I often felt drawn to just leave everything behind and escape to the Himalayas. Now, I see that as a cowardly choice. Enlightenment comes from within and can be found anywhere, whether in a cave or in a palace. I no longer view pursuing career or relationships as a threat to my higher goals, but a medium.

It’s extremely unlikely that I would choose an arranged marriage. I see marriage today as a transaction between the sexes for mutual benefit, whether it involves seeking companionship, domestic support, sex, security, or stability. What’s clear is that both parties are often more interested in receiving than giving. Such bonds rarely last, and those that do often come from a “this is the best I can do” mentality. Everyone wants love, but no one has any to give. I’d prefer “dying alone” over settling for a compromise relationship.

My views on love have changed. I believe only two independent individuals can truly love each other. Love exists when there is no obligation to stay, no expectations from the future, and a lack of self interests. One can love from a distance, everything else is just a desire in disguise.

There’s still much to learn. Discovering red pill concepts recently has been enlightening. A woman’s opportunistic approach to love shouldn’t be criticized, nor should a man’s unconditional love be overly idealized. A key question that arises is what truly leads to genuine, selfless love, and perhaps the answer lies somewhere between self acceptance and making an effort.

Growing up without deep, loving relationships has made me feel inadequate and unworthy of love, with these feelings surfacing occasionally, leaving me with a longing for connection and acceptance. This is by far has became the greatest obstacle to loving others unconditionally. The need for intimacy arises from time to time, but the awareness helps keeping it in check. Physical attraction is still a big deal for me, might as well embrace it rather than suppress it.

Right now, I have no interest in getting married or having children and see it more of a burden than a benefit to be honest. I’m not comfortable with thought of settling down as I don’t see marriage adding anything meaningful to my life. The burden of responsibilities conflicts with my current, carefree lifestyle. I’ve decided that any significant decisions in my life will be made out of love, not obligation.

If I find someone who resonates with me on the same frequency and if both of us are adding to each other’s lives without expecting anything in return, then why not, but as of now, I’m perfectly content with my solitary existence. In fact, I savour it.

Philosophy and Spirituality

Life eventually asks everyone for a purpose. A reason to keep going, to seek happiness, and to face challenges. Dropping out made me face this truth earlier in life luckily, which led me to the search for life’s meaning, and the purpose of my existence.

Is a personal philosophy really necessary? I used to find it intriguing when people shared their personal philosophies, it felt like something only a select few had. Now I see it as something everyone should think about.

We all start with basic values instilled in us during childhood: don’t harm others, don’t steal, don’t lie. But as we grow, we often question these values and, unfortunately, break them. While a single choice may not have significant consequences, compounding the right choices can lead to extraordinary achievements. This requires strong beliefs and a solid value system

At present, Advait thought guides my life. I’ve always been drawn to understanding how the world works and connecting the dots. If I could pick just one quality to be born with again, it would be curiosity, because that desire to learn has laid the groundwork for everything else I’ve gained along the way. Staying open-minded, no matter the circumstances, is one of the greatest strengths a person can have. Recognizing the non-duality in everything and seeing how it all connects brings you closer to the truth, and it’s only the truth that truly sets you free.

Spirituality is my guiding light, and philosophy steers my course. Meditation, though intermittent, brings moments of calm and tranquility. However, I feel a bit stuck right now. I’ve tried Vipassana and Pranahuti, but they haven’t really helped me advance further. I know meditation is about going beyond thoughts and can’t truly be “understood,” yet I’m still searching for a roadmap to help me progress. I haven’t mastered it yet and often get lost in thoughts about the future or memories from the past. At least I’m beginning to realize that these thoughts should be observed from a distance rather than indulged in. This awareness gives me some direction.

New horizons

I’m genuinely excited about what lies ahead.

What will I be like five years from now, at 30? Will I still be a software engineer, or will I have transitioned into a hands-on entrepreneur? Perhaps I’ll be involved in engineering cultures and laying the foundations for the new Indic civilization, or maybe I’ll be doing all of the above. Only time and my choices will tell.

To my 18-year-old self, I’d say, tough start, buddy. Things weren’t fair, but those experiences shape who you are. Make wise decisions along the way, believe in yourself, and always follow what feels right. You’re destined for greatness, so stay humble and stay curious.

And to my future self at 30, I want to say, I hope I’ll make choices that’ll make you proud.